How to communicate effectively & GET RESULTS!

How to communicate effectively & GET RESULTS!

Hello. My name’s Ronnie. Are you a mother or a father, or a teacher
or someone? Are you someone? Are you a human? Me too. I want to tell you something that’s really,
really cool and amazing. The way that we speak to students or the way
that you speak to children or even other people, if you’re a boss or you are a manager of someone
or of a company – it’s very, very important the way that you speak to people because if
you are very direct with people, they will not respond to you, and they will close down,
they will lose their confidence, and they will not do what you need them to do. I’m a teacher. Surprise. And in a classroom, there is certain language
that you can use to help students motivate them… To help motivate students, and there’s also
certain language that you can use with children or with employees to help motivate them
or encourage them. So, what I’m going to teach you today is English
phrases that you probably use, and maybe they’re not getting the results that you need in your
place of work, at home with children, or in a classroom. And the reason why is it’s because how people
react to what you say. If someone throws you negative energy, you’re
not going to respond very well to them. For example, if you’re upset and someone says:
-“Just relax. Don’t worry.” -“Don’t tell me to relax. I’m angry.” The worst thing you can do is tell someone
to relax, because it makes it worse. So, I’m going to go through some harsh phrases
and how to make them softer to encourage people to get them to do what you want. “Manipulation” is another word. So, as a teacher, I know that sometimes students
do not understand something. Now, I know because of their faces; they have
a blank stare, or they look around, or they look at the ground. So, as a teacher, you say: “Okay. Do you have any questions?” And, of course, you are shy. You don’t want to ask the teacher a question. Maybe you will look stupid if you ask the
teacher a question. So, teachers, instead of saying: “Do you have
any questions?” and waiting in silence, it would be better to say: “I’m here to help. Please ask me.” It’s the same thing if you are in a job, or
you are the manager of someone, or you are the boss of someone. Instead of saying: “Do you have any questions?”
you can be nice and say: “I’m here to help you, so please ask me questions. Feel free to ask me questions.” This makes you more approachable. “Approachable” means easier to talk to, because
you need to make sure that the people respect you, and then you can have a good relationship,
whether it be in the classroom, at a job, or with your children, or anyone really. “Why don’t you understand? Oh my god, you’re so stupid.” So, obviously there is a problem; maybe with
instructions, or language, or communication. Instead of asking the person: “Why don’t you
understand?” because they don’t know why they understand, you could say something like:
“Oh, hey. Let me show you again.” Or: “Let me tell you again how to do it.” Again, you’re taking the person and
making them help you. You want to help the person. You don’t want the person to feel stupid or
feel not good about themselves; you want to encourage people in a classroom, you want
to encourage your children to learn. As soon as you stop doing that, people shut
off; they don’t want to learn from you, they don’t want to take guidance from you, especially
in a job. You’re supposed to be a leader if you’re a
manager. You’re supposed to give people guidance. And if you don’t do that properly, no one’s
going to follow you. Your team, it’s not going to work too well. So: “Shut up! Oh my god!” I understand, as a parent, children are loud,
or in a classroom the classroom gets crazy; students are loud. You want to just scream: “Shut up!” or “Be
quiet!” Okay, do it. But if that doesn’t work, another method you
could say is, especially to children: “Please speak in a quieter voice.” So, maybe your kids are running around the
house, screaming and yelling, or they’re just so excited: “Wah! Oh my god!” That’s good. It’s good to show excitement, but it’s better
to say to them: “Please talk in a quieter voice. Please be more quiet. You don’t have to stop talking, but just keep
the level down.” There’s something I think from The Simpsons,
and they had a thing: “Inside voice and outside voice.” So, when you go outside, you have to speak
louder because there’s more interference; when you’re inside, your voice should be quieter. So, some people say: “Use your inside voice”,
which means be a little quieter. Do you know people that use their outside
voice all the time? Like on the phone: “Hey, Mom! How’s it go-…” Hey. Don’t yell at the phone; your Mom can hear
you. This is a problem with children, with other
people who aren’t children (adults) – a lot of kids like to say bad words. I say bad words. But you don’t want your child to go to school
and tell someone off or use bad words to children because it’s not cool. So, you can say to your child: “Hey, hey,
hey. Do you know what? Let’s… let’s please speak with respect to
other people. You might be angry right now or you might
have a problem, but bad words do not solve anything. Let’s talk with respect and try and
work out the problem.” It’s the same in an office. If two office… If co-workers are going crazy, and they’re… They’re: “Ah!” They hate each other, they want to kill each
other or there’s a problem – don’t use bad words because, again, that escalates into
violence. Oh, that’s chaos. Not that bad, but it just has bad energy. So, try and get the person to use a calmer
voice and talk about things. This is really good for children because kids
love to do this. I guess I’m a kid; I like to make a mess,
too. So, kids like to make a mess. “Make a mess” means put things everywhere,
get things dirty, colour on things, leave toys everywhere. Kids do this; it’s natural. And you get angry because you have to clean it. But, hey, how about you get your kid to clean it? How about you teach them how to be responsible
with their things? So, instead of saying: “Ah, you made a mess!”
you can say: “Woo! It looks like you had fun today. Let’s clean it up now. I’ll help you.” Or: “You’ll clean this up and it’ll be better.” You want to encourage the child to clean up
his or her own mess. Not you; you’re not the maid of your child. You want to teach the kid responsibility and
how to do things for themselves; very important. Next one. Now, this is something that is very frustrating. You give people instructions at a job, in
a classroom, or for anyone, and they do it wrong or they just don’t do it, and you say:
“Oh my god. I already told you how to do this. Why didn’t you do it the correct way? What’s wrong with you?” So this shuts the person down; they will not
want to do anything for you again. So, instead of saying this, you can say: “Oh,
do you know what? Let me give you another example of how I want
you to do this or how this could be done.” Maybe the person didn’t really understand
you, and that’s why they didn’t do it the way you wanted them to,
or they’re just being disrespectful. You always have to find out the proper situation first. Is the person doing this because they just
want to, or do they clearly not understand what’s happened? If that’s the case, give them another example,
tell them again, help them. If you help them, they help you; it’s a two-way street. This is a big one, too. Now, people overreact all the time. And as I told you at the beginning: “Relax. Oh my god. You’re taking life too seriously.” Well, everyone is entitled to their own emotions. If something makes you angry or something
makes you sad, that’s fine; those are your emotions, and you have the right to express
them any way you want. But if you tell someone: “You’re overreacting! Relax! Calm down!” this makes the person sadder,
makes them cry more, or it makes them more angry. You don’t want to do that. You want the person to relax, but without
telling them. So, you can say: “Hey, hey, hey. Don’t worry.” Maybe you give your child a task to do and
they can’t do it, say: “Don’t worry. Try it again. You can do it.” You need to encourage children, you need to
encourage people if they fail to do it again, and again, and again. By this time, just give up. I mean, come on. They’re never going to do it. But you need to tell them to at least try to do it. It’s kind of like me and math. I’m terrible in math, and I just gave up. Now I have a calculator. Yes. Thank you, cell phones. Math teachers, I don’t need your help. Another thing that we do because we understand
more than a student, or more than a child, or maybe more than a worker is we tell people: “What? It’s not hard; it’s easy. Come on. Why can’t you do this?” So, this makes the person feel stupid. “Oh my god. I can’t do this.” Especially children, if you say: “Come on,
you can… Why can’t you do this?” the child feels like
they don’t want to try even. So, again, you’re going to encourage them. Say: “Do you know what? Oh, this is hard for you; that’s okay. Let me help you. You can do it.” Again, when you encourage people, it makes
them want to try the thing again. So, if you are a teacher in a classroom and
you’re having control issues with your class, or if you are a mother or a father or a babysitter
or you have kids around you and you need them to follow your instructions and respect you,
if you’re a boss at a job or a manager and the employees aren’t working well together
– I want you to examine yourself. I want you to look to see if you are a good
leader; if you are using language that actually encourages people or most of the time-and
I do this, too-we use language that makes people close up and not want to help. So, take a look at yourself, and then you
can help the people that need your guidance. This is all the tips I have for today. Go out, have fun at work,
and encourage people to be good. Don’t be evil.


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    Gyan Ganga

    It is really very effectively explanation of the sentences which we are requirements generally every day in life, thank you so much madam for such a great job.

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    Ali Abdelsattar

    To be honest with you I have never ever seen a teacher like you! You are amazing 😉 . I am trying as much as I can to be patient with my children,but it’s really difficult even I have wonderful 3 little men . Anyway thank you.

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    But sometimes I like talking like angry grandpa!😂😂😂🤘🏻🤘🏻🤘🏻whattttttt where you from? Whattttt? Whattt you talking where you from? I don‘t care it…😂😂😂😂I love it!

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    Jose Luis Santos

    Thank roonie your hav a great videos and i hav learm much with this i hop you continue teaching becouse u are great teacher thank you

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    Shirly Sanchez

    Wow I loved it. English is not my native languages however I will try to express myself. That’s the kind of teacher we need 😎Was so pretty your explanation thank you so much 😘

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    Leonardo Dias

    Ronnie, I really love your videos, you really can get all my attention. This one has very useful advices. Thank so much!

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    Sergey Chistov

    Thank you, Ronnie. But could you stand on the right or on the left next time? I mean it's not convenient to read phrases when you stand in front of board.

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    Ассоль Тургунбекова

    Ronney, I love you ♥️ You are the best teacher in the world 🌎 I watch your lessons from Russia 🇷🇺 , Kyrgyzstan 🇰🇬

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    Annet B.

    But you can't always be positive and non-agressive. Sometimes people are so annoying that repeating these positive mantras doesn't give you a result.

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    You are really good teacher!
    Thanks for helping us!

    I have been learning a lot!

    I would like to suggest that you make some lessons about slang and "way of natives speakers talking". For example: I gotcha = native speaker
    I understand = foreign

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    Marina Vucerakovic

    There are differents between British and American language especially in the formation of sentences.

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    Sepideh Hesamzadeh

    Can't stop loving you madam 😇😇i'm an english teacher too but i have to work more 100 years to maybe become someone like you , i wish nothing but the best for you 😂😍😍😍😙😚🤗😇😘😗

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    Zair Hanzo

    what a kind woman you are!!!you were explained theme so clearly helpfully and what is not less important merryly,this is the reasons why I respect your engagement very much.
    Best regard

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    Im a b*tch, im a lover,
    Im a child, im a mother,
    Im a sinner, im a saint.
    I do not feel ashamed. 🤪✋🏻

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    Would you allow me to translate voice it into Arabic and then take the videotape into my channel without being insulted?

    Wiating your reply please Ronnie

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    Thank you, Ronnie. You are a very good teacher really. I’m from Russia and i cant speak English so fine how i want, but i can easily understand what are you talking, that makes me happy!

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    Hafiz Muhammad Usman Ghani

    Miss Ronnie is the best teacher
    She encourages people i also daily watch her videos
    Her teaching skill is very best
    love from Pakistan

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    Diane Channel

    hello teacher Ronnie i'm from philippines and i love your videos so much!!and you are the best teacher. <3

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    Reinel Camilo

    Me gusta mucho escucharte, soy estudiante en ESL and my listenig improve better with you. I have been living here in London Ontario for three years and always see your vídeos.eres la mejor.

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    Geribeth Moronta

    Hi Ronnie, I love all your lessons, I'm from Venezuela, but I'm living in Colombia right now. Thanks for your time and dedication. you're amazing.

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    Tinkuy By Ylla

    Hi RONNIE Thank you for your lessons. I would like that you make a video about vocabulary that use in Hotels or travel agency . I'm from PERU-CUSCO, You and emma are the best teachers.

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    Mateus Santos

    omg I love you so much dear Ronnie! You are the best in engvid.
    I've just realized that my subscription had been canceled.
    Greetings from Brazil

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    lou cordero

    i really love..the way u teach very interesting and i always watch ur video every night.

    When i was a kid my mother shouting us while playing with my sister saying shout up!!!stop it!!! while smashing the pillow haha
    i just remember those memories..

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    Albert The Stranger

    Ronnie i can't even find the words to express how I feel about your talent to give so positive vibes and knowledge at the same time. You're good person,great teacher and very nice woman,thank you for all you do to us. P.S. The math is the mess. Cheers!

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    Marcelievsky Romanenko

    God Bless you Ronnie, you're amazing, true and respectful (a little crazy, but that's make things very funny))

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    Nancy Rome

    I think English is the most difficult language in the world, because I live in USA and I've been here for 19 years and still don't know how to speak fluent in English. It's the first time I've found a good English teacher. Thank God there is still hope to learn the blessed language. Teacher, the Lord bless your life and reward you for this wonderful job you do.🌹🌹🌹🌷🌷🌷💖

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    Lilian Garcia Bladeras

    teacher Ronnie, you’re so funny, I really like your videos and I can understand everything that you say

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    V_ S!

    Sometimes the right phonetic of a word is very different to the "quotidian" one. For example: the "t" sound like a "r" to me…motivate (morivate); twenty (tweny) haha..etc, etc. I feel so estranged to pronouncing them in the right classic way.

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